able to trust again???
A broken trust relationship leads to hurt fear confusion and anger. Those feelings are real and reasonable and you're now cautious about trusting within close relationships. But by dismissing all close trusting relationships you're also closing the door to great joy and a fullness of life God intends for you. I know that seems a little extreme but this is my opinion and you can agree or disagree. The reason I believe this is because I have experienced it first hand. About a year ago something happened that really changed my perspective on "closing" people out. I thought I already learned my lesson on this a year ago but now I have to be reminded of this again .I was so frustrated on night and I was praying and pray and praying but not feeling an answer on the situation I was so adamantly praying about so my flesh kicked in and I was like "God!! Why am I not hearing you??!!!" As soon as that came out of my mouth I just heard this "Because, your plugging your ears."...I had no idea what that meant and the first picture that came to mind was when a little Kid is having a tantrum and don't wanna hear what someone is saying the hold their ears. I was like...okkk um explain please. I felt him say "your plugging your ears because thorough the years you have been hurt and the things people did or said about you went through your ears straight to your heart so now, you have closed people out so you wont have to deal with it but, in the meantime have shut me out as well." I know it seems like a harsh thing to hear but you guys, I felt it in the warmest way, no condemnation, no judgment just pure love. I finally realized that even though I didn't mean too but shutting myself out from everyone I unintentionally shut God out. Most likely, I did this because I didn't feel like dealing with the hurt just putting it on the back burner for another day.
I don't like feeling like a victim or portraying myself as one. I'm just like everyone else and everyone has been a victim to something. By this, I am referring to everything not just "crimes". It has been said that my parents have made us kids think we are victims?? Please step back because you don't know my life or what I've been through so please don't try to narrate my life story. I believe if you are honest with yourself you have gone through something that made you feel like your trust and faith in people was up for debate. If your like me, you been through enough heartaches to even care to allow people in because hey...in a few years your probably going to leave like everyone does. And guess what?? People do leave and move on, Its life. But theres ways you can go about it that will make the absence of the person(s) to not be negative. Sure, you'll miss them but when you think about them it wont be in a negative way. Now because this is life its not always going to be a great feeling when people leave. But we have to make sure we don't judge everyone by the last person, whether it was a good or bad situation you were in. After hurt or betrayal it is extremely tempting to withdraw into a shell in which we can no longer be hurt. In trusting no-one we feel that we are safe that we won't be hurt again. It is normal for this process to occur for a short while after a hurt has been dealt to us. For example, after the first few weeks or months after a break up we are naturally reluctant to date again. That is normal and to some extent healthy. We would not have made it very far as a species if we simply repeated actions which caused us to be harmed over and over again. I don't have this down pat yet, I still am dealing with learning to just trust! It can be hard but so important to get back to the place where you can trust. Yes we should guard our hearts but that doesn't always mean that we need to have a fortress around it and concrete poured all around it. Be smart about who and what you trust in.
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight." (Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV)
It isn't possible for even your closest friends to be totally trustworthy but someone else is -- Jesus Christ the Son of God. His love for you is overwhelming and led him to live a perfect life for all of us in this imperfect world. He knows all our sin and need for help. In love He lived, died and rose from the dead so all who place their trust in Him have forgiveness of sins and the perfection of heaven. While we have broken our trust relationship with Him. He will never fail us. We can trust Him. His love, His forgiveness and His help in every situation
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4 comments:
WOW!!! Something I am going through right now and this spoke to my heart! I can't even explain to you how much this touched me!!! Thank yoU!!! What a blessing:) I really needed to read this today.....Thanks!
You really don't even know how much I needed this. God really spoke to me through this and I am so thankful that you chose to write this. God bless you so much!! You are amazing! :D
love it!
Wow..Thank you for your transparency! I have learned this as well..Forgive those as the LORD has forgiven you. Trust has to re earned..but FORGIVENESS we all should be willing to give do to Christ love towards us.
I am learning that my friendships are temporary/seasonal just like all the other things in this world that are passing away. I must not hold NOTHING closer to Christ in my heart! Cant wait to read more!
Nicole :)
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